Breathe...

Have you ever hyperventilated? Or been so scared that you had shallow breathing? Any interrupted breathing of any kind? When you stare fear in the face your heart starts pounding. Your mouth starts to feel dry, maybe you feel a little nauseous, and your breathing starts to accelerate.

After that, rapid breathing becomes insufficient, and you start to feel light-headed like you just blew up some balloons. So you take deeper breaths. Someone tells you to breathe through your nose and out through your mouth. Hold it, and release slowly. All of these different ways of breathing can affect our stress levels. You can control your nervous system and the response it’s going to have by your breath.

I've been using an app that has evidence-based research on the different types of breathing. You can select different breathing patterns for calm, sleep, recharge, awake, alleviate, unwind, energize, and cool down. Fascinating huh. Your breath, something we don’t have to think about can hold so much power. I recently went to the chiropractor and she asked me how I breathe, and I thought, normal?

Apparently, not. There is an effective way of breathing and one that is still effective but with some side effects.

Short answer. Yes, I've been doing the one with side effects.

I am what is called a thoracic breather. I use more of my chest and my shoulder to breathe in, instead of my belly and diaphragm. I've been breathing like I'm running from a mountain lion for probably the last 10 years. My body thinks it has a reason to be afraid. During physicals, doctors have noted my shoulders raising when I take a deep inhale. I didn’t think much of it, because the air was going in. I wasn’t dead so what was the big deal?

I know this seems boring but stick with me. The way it was explained to me, the way I was breathing is actually more work. I'm creating more tension in my body. Duh. Of course, it is. When you look up tension in the dictionary you will see me. In all my tense glory.

I've mentioned before the physical manifestations of my anxiety and it’s mainly in my back, my shoulders my neck, and my low back? Why the H does my low back hurt? Oh because of my breath. When the chiro explained that to me it all made sense. So I've decided to change that.

I've been incorporating stretches, different types of breathing, and sitting on my hands when I'm at the computer. Basically what I'm doing is avoiding breathing into my chest. It’s taken a lot of work to breathe into my belly and use my diaphragm. When she told me, I was open to the idea of new breathing and trying the techniques she gave me but there was some slight skepticism.

That crap is working. First I started with very exaggerated belly breathing and stretching for 2 weeks straight. Anytime I had a second I was very mindful of my posture, how my shoulders are sitting, my back, all of the things. I'm still mindful of what is going on, and that’s the difference. I have ignored a lot of pain in my body.

You're probably wondering why I would write about breathing, but for me, switching and training out of thoracic breathing has really helped my body. Respecting the way it’s supposed to work is hard to do. Teaching yourself to breathe is very difficult, and to think about it is even harder.

Incorporating yoga and other various stretches, has allowed my body to come back to its natural rhythm. It feels respected, and it feels like it’s doing what it’s supposed to. I've adapted to being uncomfortable. I've gotten used to the pain and constant tension in my back. Usually, during a yoga practice, the teacher mentions to scan your body and focus on any tension in your body. See if you can alleviate that. Do you need to strengthen something else? Back off and respect your body can't do that? Do you need to lean in a little more?

When I heard the first initial question, I thought well everything is tense. Then it clicked, that’s not right. I should not be tense everywhere. I shouldn't have difficulty pinpointing what tension is worst. That’s when I knew it was time to work on that. The more yoga I'm doing, the more I can come more in tune with my body. The more breathing exercises I do, the easier it’s getting. I finally feel like after a couple of weeks I can take a nice deep breath.

I imagined my diaphragm was like a bow and arrow. I was drawing back that diaphragm as hard as I could, and letting it go slowly. That was the first and only time I have ever done that. I've tried to remember how I did that because it felt incredible. That breath was so refreshing. It felt successful. Is that the right word?

I also felt like the months that I've been doing breathing exercises finally was coming together. The stretching still has a long way to go, and I think because I did some extra stretching and yoga that day, I was able to breathe successfully.

It’s been a slow process, and I am not a patient person. I assume that if I did the work I should see results or at least a glimmer of hope. But most of the time, nada. The stretching is still so much work. I mean what is in there that makes it so stinking tight?

It feels like my back is made of stone, and every time I stretch it out and do the work my chiro told me to do, I'm SLOWLY!!! Very slowly, chipping away at that stone. You know on Aladdin when the genie comes out of the lamp and says "10,000 years will give you such a crick in the neck." That's me. 10,000 days of stress and disrespect to my body has given me such a sore back, shoulders, neck, legs, arms….

Picture credit: Catie Menke